How to Unlock Emotional Intelligence in Your Students: 5 Tips and Techniques

A student lacking emotional intelligence finds it difficult to manage their anger and frustration, causing them to display aggressive and hurtful behavior to others.

Let’s call our imaginary student Sarah. She’s highly competitive and wants to be in charge. During projects, she dismisses her teammates' ideas and manipulates them to use hers, and when their team doesn’t win, she blames everyone else, causing them emotional pain. 

Clearly, Sarah and her project mates need emotional intelligence to deal with such situations. 

Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize and manage your emotions, as well as perceive, interpret and respond to the emotions of others.

You can impart this intelligence to your students by employing Positive Action’s Evidence-Based Character Education Programs into your school's curriculum.

Character education programs aim to connect students with the concept of morality. They’re conducted through open classroom discussions, and teach morals such as respect, honesty, and empathy, which are foundational to emotional intelligence.

As an educator, providing emotional intelligence training to your students is a worthwhile investment that benefits them with:

• Better decision-making due to increased self-awareness
• Improved focus leading to better academic performance
• A positive school climate brought by positive behavior
• Better relationships with peers and the community

The following tips and techniques will help foster personal development in your students, which in turn will help them understand and manage their emotions constructively.

Tip 1 - Create Self-Awareness in Your Students

Teaching your students self-awareness enables them to understand their emotions, feelings, behaviors, and personality traits.

That awareness allows them to gain an accurate perception of themselves and how their choices and actions influence fellow students, teachers, parents, and others around them.

There are several techniques you can apply to help your students become self-aware:

• Encourage journaling and taking self assessment quizzes to help them understand their strengths, weaknesses, values, and beliefs
• Show them mindfulness exercises such as deep breathing and meditation to help them learn how to control their emotions
• Use reflective questioning such as, “How did that make you feel?” or “What could you have done better?” to instill in them the habit of introspection
• Teach them how to get in touch with their feelings by using emotional vocabulary such as angry, surprised, happy, or scared

Self-awareness is closely tied to self-concept, which refers to an individual’s beliefs about themselves whether physically, emotionally, socially, or spiritually.

At Positive Action, we’re grounded on a broad theory of self-concept which postulates that people determine their self-concept by what they do, and that positive choices result in feelings of self-worth.

By helping your students to be aware of themselves, they’ll recognize any false beliefs they have, such as thinking they must respond angrily when offended.

This self-awareness will pave the way to build a new and positive concept about themselves such as, “I can resolve conflicts calmly” or “I will not be stressed during exams.”

Through our evidence-based and research-based programs for educators and families, instilling a positive self-concept in your students is now possible.

With a new, healthy self-concept, their emotional intelligence will be unlocked, and they’ll be much more conscious of the consequences of their actions to themselves, and the people around them. 

Bonus Tip: Use group discussion activities to encourage students to reflect on their emotions and share their experiences with others.

Tip 2 - Teach Them How to Manage Their Emotions

Emotional management is the ability to regulate emotions and impulsive reactions in a constructive manner.

By learning how to manage their emotions, your students will be able to adapt to different emotional situations without being overwhelmed.

The first technique to help your students manage emotions is to be a good role model. Therefore, don’t display bouts of anger even when under pressure, remember, they’re looking up to you as an example.

Secondly, encourage communication. It will provide a safe and open classroom environment that encourages your students to express their emotions without fear of judgment.

Another way is to help your students understand which situations trigger certain emotional situations, which prepares them to respond intelligently the next time the situation happens.

Let them know that emotional triggers could come from an upcoming exam, starting a new grade, broken friendships, family issues, or moving to a new location.

Point out healthy coping mechanisms they can apply, such as engaging in sports activities, art and craft, playing a musical instrument, or spending time with family and friends.

Finally, praise your students whenever they control their emotions in an intelligent way. It will motivate them to continue with positive actions.

With everyone’s emotions under control, schools enjoy a positive school climate and healthy learning environments where students are on their best behavior.

Our School Climate Curriculum is a form of positive behavior support to reinforce what’s learned in the classroom. One of the kits in the curriculum is the Elementary Climate Kit, which comes with these materials:

• Assemblies
• Stickers
• “Word of the week” cards
• ICU (I See You Doing Something Positive) boxes
• A self-explanatory manual for the principal
• 12 support staff handbooks
• 3 parent handbooks
• 6 teacher’s material boxes
• Certificate of Recognition

Each of our curriculum kits is designed for one classroom and has materials for 30 students. The curriculum also follows a common unit design from pre-kindergarten to high school to ensure the same concepts are taught to all age groups.

Here is a selection of our middle school curriculum kits:

By training your students how to manage their emotions, they’ll treat themselves and others with integrity, and school will be a fulfilling place for everyone.

Action: Encourage students to engage in physical activity to help them manage their emotions and reduce stress.

Tip 3 - Encourage Your Students to Be Empathetic

Empathy is the ability to appreciate and show compassion to other people's emotional responses by looking at them from their perspective.

By stressing on the importance of showing empathy to others, you're setting up your students for successful relationships with their friends, family, teachers, and even future workmates.

Some empathy-building techniques to use in your lessons include:

• Encouraging them to practice active listening in conversation, which shows that they’re validating other people’s feelings and experiences
• Showing them how to use empathetic language such as, “ I understand how you feel” or “That must have been difficult for you”
• Using role-play, where students play out scenarios that require sympathy so that they understand how it feels to be in need of sympathy

Empathy is necessary to eliminate bullying because when students finally understand how it feels to be bullied, they’ll be eager to be compassionate to others.

Implementing a character education program such as Positive Action will help students see through the eyes of morality, where everyone is treated equally.

Our Bullying Prevention Program is an effective tool to prevent all kinds of bullying at school, including cyberbullying.

Through this program, your students will understand that bullying behaviors are a form of low self esteem, and that there are positive actions that help to increase it.

A sample lesson from this program is How I Want to Be Treated, which focuses on the social and emotional positive actions of treating others with empathy, respect, and compassion.

There’s an interesting story woven into the lesson to help your students relate to bullying better. The story is titled Big Trouble at Freeport School and features several classmates in a heated debate.

In the story, some students say they don’t associate with “dweebs,” “geeks,” and “soldier girls in camos,” while others advocate equal treatment for everyone.

Their debate is cut short when an emergency situation happens to one of them, causing them to put themselves in her shoes. At that moment, everyone—including the bullies—realizes the importance of being compassionate to one another.

Such are the kind of interesting lessons to expect from our training kits. We have numerous sample lessons available for pre-kindergarten up to high school, which are available for download.

By integrating character education into your curriculum, your students will soon start acting with empathy, a valuable skill needed to foster a bully-free environment.

Expert Tip: Incorporate peer-to-peer feedback to help students gain a better understanding of how their actions impact others.

Tip 4 - Train Them How to Resolve Conflicts

Conflict resolution is the ability to solve disagreements in a respectful manner by handling your own emotions, as well as other people's emotions.

As an educator, the following techniques are useful for imparting conflict resolution skills to your students:

• Teach them how to listen actively to the other person by maintaining eye contact and nodding to show understanding
• Let them know it’s not okay to interrupt the other person when they’re speaking, even when they’re not in agreement 
• Make them practice assertive communication where they’re free to use “I” in a conflict without appearing rude
• Show them how to self-regulate by taking deep breaths or taking a break from the conflict, then addressing it again with a clear mind
• Teach them that they’re free to negotiate with the other party and reach a middle ground, which is a win-win for both of them

After using our Evidence-Based Conflict Resolution Program at your school for a while, everyone will be relieved to find that student conflicts are resolved before they turn ugly.

Interestingly, the Conflict Resolution Kit in this program has a Conflict Resolution Plan that your students will find helpful in settling their disputes.

You may purchase the main kit together with the Conflict Resolution Kit Refresher, which contains all the materials needed to replenish the original one for one school year.

Positive Action’s character education programs do a world of good for young people. With this specific conflict curriculum, they’ll be groomed to solve their disputes responsibly without intervention from authority.

Tip 5 - Build Resilience Into Their Core

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks and adversity through managing stress, adopting positivity, persevering, and applying other coping strategies. 

Building resilience in your students is all about teaching them how to cope with anger, frustration, hopelessness, anxiety, and other negative emotions that accompany setbacks.

You’ll accomplish this by fostering in them a growth mindset that helps them see setbacks as opportunities for growth.

Point out to the students what lessons come with each setback, then they’ll be able to persevere when faced with similar situations in the future, knowing they’ll learn something out of it.

Lack of resilience may drive students to drug use as a way of dealing with stress at home or at school. For example, a student who experiences bullying at school and abuse at home might be lured to taking drugs in order to numb the emotional pain.

Your students need to learn that drugs aren’t the solution to their problems. Our Drug Prevention Program kits are a good supplement to making students aware of the importance of choosing a drug-free lifestyle. 

They need to be aware that there are alternative ways of coping with their problems, such as:

• Talking to a trusted adult or teacher about their problems
• Having friends to interact with instead of staying isolated
• Getting enough sleep to relax their body and mind
• Setting goals so that they have something to focus on

All these resilience-building activities push students through challenges and help improve absenteeism, which sometimes happens when demoralized students miss classes.

Through character education, you’ll foster the personal growth and well-being of your students by instilling moral and ethical values in them.

These values often catch the attention of others, like Kim Loop, a Homecare Supervisor who had a remarkable experience with Positive Action:

One of the mental health workers Kim supervises was making a home visit when the children got home from school. Bursting with excitement, one of them pulled out Positive Action sheets and explained to his mother that positive actions included eating well, getting rest, and treating others respectfully, and that he could add other positive actions as well if he wanted to. The caseworker was amazed and couldn’t wait to share the story at their next staff meeting.

It’s truly uplifting to see children being transformed by the Positive Action curriculum and becoming excited about self-development, morality, and other positive values.

It All Starts With Character Education

Developing emotional intelligence is a critical component of self-development, academic success, and overall student well-being.

By employing evidence-based teaching practices, teachers help their students to learn self-awareness, social relationships, and emotional regulation techniques. 

As an educator, using the practical techniques for promoting emotional intelligence that we’ve outlined will equip your students with the social skills they need, not only in school but later in life. 

By doing so, you’ll help them become successful and resilient individuals who relate well with peers, teachers, parents, and the community at large.

Positive Action has strengthened the relationships between staff and youth at the Boys and Girls Club of Southwest Missouri: 

Members have worked hard to bring a positive environment to the club as a whole. One member has struggled with her self image and battled suicidal thoughts. Being actively engaged in the Positive Action programming helped to build a relationship with that staff and help her feel comfortable enough to talk to the staff and ask for help.

Ready to use Positive Action programs? Schedule a webinar with us and find out how Positive Action is beneficial to your students and staff.